Five sure ways to Get your Husband to help around the house more

A newly married young lady was venting her abundant anger about the bumbling, lazy, irresponsible behavior of men in general, and her own husband in particular. This is the first impression she paints of the man with whom she has vowed to spend her life. In fact, she was insisting he go to the doctor for a hearing test. She was quite certain the man was deaf. 

Survey shows that 46% of moms get irate with their husbands once a week or more." Not angry or frustrated, but irate. Both partners loose when this type of interaction becomes routine. The woman ends up feeling perpetually disappointed, and she's resentful that she has been put in the position of a nag cum slave since every house chore fall on her shoulders. The man feels belittled, and he's weary hearing her complains and of being on the defensive against his wife. They find themselves wondering how their relationship came to this. Where is the kind and nurturing woman he married? Where is the dependable, stand-up guy with whom she fell in love?

Here is a list of things that would help:

 1 . Behave Respectfully: Even If You Don't Feel Like It, One of the truly unfortunate aspects of my newly married friend blabbing about her husband was the profound lack of respect for the man she once admired enough to marry. In essence, she called him an idiot. Publicly. It was downright rude. Mutually respectful behavior is important because it sets the tone of the relationship. It is like the strings section of a symphony. The music simply cannot be complete without it. I know what some of you are thinking because I've had similar thoughts. "Why should I make the first move? HE is the one behaving like a jerk", "Frankly, I'm just too angry to be respectful" etc. Yes, we feel like that at times but refusing to make the first peace offering in your relationship may feel righteous in the moment, but it is one of those behaviors that almost always achieves the opposite of our desires.
Being respectful will resurrect the man you fell in love with. 
Your husband has a need to feel that he is the head, the provider, the protector, the leader. Accord him that courtesy and he is most likely to cherish you and in turn you will help around the house even without you asking for it.

2. Give him his precious freedom:When he feels free, he is more open to new ideas suggested in a relaxed and fun conversation where there is no pressure. Never allow him to feel pressured to do anything no matter how you desperately want him to do it. Since men have a great need to feel freedom, if a wife really wants her husband to improve or do certain things, there are ways to get him to do this without nagging, the wife can be creative with this and it can be done in such a way as to make him think it was his idea. It is important for men to feel their freedom and that they make the decisions in the marriage. Nagging makes him rebellious not only because he feels his freedom and security are taken away but also because it gives the impression that you don’t trust him as a leader and this makes him feel less of a man as it is part of his precious masculine pride.

3. Ask for help: This is where some women fail it. They carry the whole baggage of chores around grumbling that they do not get help when actually they never asked for it. Learn to tell your husband exactly what you want him to help you with and don't make it sound like it has become his duty to do that particular chore. Ask in a sweet tone. Like: oh my, I don't want the kids to be late to school today, honey please help me dress them up while I pack their lunch and yours.....and be sure to say thank u even when he pretends not to hear your thank you. Don't repeat your request, he actually heard you the first time. 

4. Appreciate him. A steady diet of praise for the things he does well can motivate him to overcome his weaknesses and be a better man. Appreciation can help a man grow to a higher potential. It also makes him behave better which makes for a better marriage for both of you. 
 
5. Make him volunteer to help: This is just a new addition to my list of how to get him to help around the house. I will use an illustration to demonstrate this. My husband loves vegetable soup and it takes time to prepare because of the time spent in picking the vegetables, so i would normally start out like this: "honey, I would really love to make you vegetable soup dis weekend but I am still thinking of how to get my self organized since there are many things that need my attention." As soon as he hears this, leave the rest to him because he will make sure nothing stands in the way of him getting his vegetable soup. He will plan the chores himself and actually choose the tough ones, finish them early and join me in picking the vegetables. This is just one of my many examples and I am certain you will find a way of making your man volunteer to help around the house.