Your First Night

While Sexual promiscuity is the order of the day, there are still couples who vowed and have kept to their vows to maintain chastity till their wedding night, don't even disagree with me cos I have seen and been with them. They often seem to be filled with anxiety as the date approaches. This article is to help you. And don't you ever worry, it gets better with time so no one will nail you for not doing it right the first time. just get ready to learn and of course very fast too.

First night sex in a couple's life is always filled with anxiety, nervousness, hesitation and there are many questions which creep up in the back of your mind but with proper guidance and information you can make your first night memorable. For many people, the first time is quite unpleasant. If it is an arranged marriage then it will be very much difficult to open up and be sexually motivated on the first night itself but just remember one thing - sex is not at all important on the first night, get to know each other better and take it easy. You can also begin with touching and kissing and exploring each other but have sex only if you are ready for it and you are comfortable. Sex under pressure is no good and it leads to bitterness and disappointments. Make sure that both of you understand each other and respect each others feelings and desire's. However for a couple, who have really developed friendship, first time is easier since, you know each and have probably discussed sexuality you will be are more comfortable with each other.

Some women might have pain and bleeding during coitus because the hymen breaks. Men might have premature ejaculation. These things happen because it's the first time your body experiences such emotions and extreme passion but with time, all these will settle down. But you can always make your first time really special and cherish it all your life.



Here are answers to some questions that might bother you:

Will it hurt the first time? Will I bleed?
This is the most common question that girls ask. And the answer is "yes" you MIGHT bleed but MUST NOT and it will hurt a little when you have sexual intercourse for the first time. Wether you bleed or not are dependent on a lot of issues. The bleeding usually occurs because the girl has a hymen, which breaks the first time she has sexual intercourse. Sometimes a girl might already have broken her hymen as a result of playing sports, doing strenuous exercise or horse riding. However with the right touch and the right partner, you should be able to enjoy your first time without much pain. Take your time, do not force yourself, use a lubricant if necessary, and guide him through. Tell him when it feels good and when it hurts.

Am I ready for sex?
This is also another question, which bothers you, and you feel that may be it is not the right time or maybe you should wait but you are not sure. Well, since you agreed to walk down the aisle you sure can't be unready. If you think that you are too stressed out on the first night, then you will have to discuss and agree with your spouse that you will have no coitus the first night. However, there are many ways in which you can give and receive sexual pleasure without having sexual intercourse. For some people giving each other massages, kissing and hugging can be very passionate and can be more fulfilling than sexual intercourse. Therefore what is important is to be comfortable in each other company and not to be selfish in making this decision. Once you think that you are ready then go ahead and do it. And believe me this time it will really be fulfilling and memorable.. IF U WANT MY ADVICE, DON'T PLACE LIMITS, GO LOOSE SINCE YOU'VE GOT THE LICENSE.

How do I have "good" sex?
For this what is most important as discussed above is being comfortable and relaxed in each other's company and wanting to have sex without any compulsion or pressure. It's natural to feel some worries but good communication is the key. Being relaxed and able to share things with your partner who is also probably feeling nervous will ease the tension. And what follows is not a set of rules. Rules about sex are impossible-- what should matter is that what you do makes you feel good. And "feeling good" should last past the sex itself. And that means loving beyond the sheets, your love life doesn't have to be all about sex..

Will I be a good lover?
Don't worry about this question at all. Being a good lover doesn't happen automatically and immediately. You have to give it a little time cos it's something that varies based on the persons involved, your first task is to understand your partner, know his likes/dislikes and give him pleasure. And of course with the right partner, patience, time, care, and practice, you will definitely become a great lover. Your first times, for both you, will be fumbling, embarrassing and awkward, but hopefully they'll be the start of great times ahead for the rest of your lives.